Preheat the confusion: Set your oven to somewhere around 350°F. Maybe. If your oven has a "guess" setting, use that.
Mix the indecision: In a large bowl, combine the flour, sugar, and brown sugar. If you can’t tell the difference, just close your eyes and hope for the best.
Butter up the chaos: Add the butter. If it’s not soft enough, microwave it until it explodes. Clean up the mess and try again.
Egg-citing times: Crack the egg(s) into the bowl. If any shells get in, just tell yourself it adds texture.
Extract the mayhem: Pour in the vanilla (or whatever extract you grabbed in your blind haste). It's probably fine.
Powdery surprise: Add the baking soda (or whichever white powder you picked up). Sprinkle in the salt, unless you already used it as sugar.
Chocolate (or betrayal) chips: Fold in the chocolate chips. Accidentally use raisins if you like to live dangerously.
Randomness rules: Stir in the "Spontaneous madness" ingredient. It could be anything: sprinkles, crushed pretzels, or a dash of chili powder.
Spoonfuls of suspense: Drop spoonfuls of the dough onto a baking sheet. Space them out well because these cookies might spread, rise, or just merge into one giant cookie.
Bake and pray: Place the sheet in the oven and bake for 10-12 minutes. Keep an eye on them because anything could happen.
Disaster tasting: Let the cookies cool, then taste. If they’re terrible, tell everyone it’s a new experimental recipe. If they’re good, act like you knew what you were doing all along.